Worst form of betrayal.

We have all been betrayed. At some point it did not matter whether it was something small but when that element of trust is broken it will never be the same. In my opinion betrayal  from others hurts but you get over it. You can choose to part ways with the person or learn from the experience. The worst form of betrayal for me is self-betrayal. There is nothing as bad as going against my values or what I truly believe in. Think about it, you can’t run away from yourself , the thoughts and feelings. We have found ways to escape but it never makes things better. I am not saying that I am perfect but the times I screwed up it damaged me. I feel like you even go through some form of depression and it takes a while for it to sink. It is also very hard to forgive yourself and I think that is why we have issues of depression, suicide and addiction. In my opinion we are running from something or broken because of something that happened. We have reached a point where we cannot control everything , let alone please everyone. We are compromising on so many things forgetting what we truly stand for and little do you know it is slowly destroying you inside.

Society is the worst critic. She said this? Who does she think she is? Why do you do it that way? Everyone has an opinion about everything and not everyone wishes you well. I will not lie sometimes hearing such comments hurts you even start doubting yourself. One of the lessons I have come to live by is if I can sleep peacefully at night or deep down know what I am doing is best for me ( Self acualization) then I am good. You have to re-evaluate your values, your stand and yourself. What makes you happy? What do you love doing? What gives you peace? There are too many questions but basically know yourself. I will leave you a poem that I came across which I felt summed up everything.

When you get what you want in your struggle for self and the world makes you queen for a day, just go to the mirror and look at yourself, and see what that woman has to say.
For it isn’t your mother, your father, your husband, or children’s whose judgement you must pass.

The person’s whose verdict counts most in your life is the one staring back from the glass.

She’s the person to please, never mind all the rest, for she’s with you clear up to the end, and you’ve passed your most dangerous and difficult test, if the woman in glass is your friend.

You may fool the whole world down the pathway of life, and get pats on your back as you pass.

But your final reward will be heartache and tears – if you’ve cheated the woman in the glass.

Dale Wimbrow

And finally…..

You’ve got to know yourself. You’ve got to know what ignites your magic, what fires your soul into performing majestic acts of love. You’ve got to know yourself so much that not even a hundred voices will drown yours. You’ve got to own yourself: this journey is all yours. All yours. No one can do it and you decide whenever you are ready to embark on it. Unlearn, learn, master yourself and love yourself or else they will define you and that’s a poisonous kind of life. That’s death.
Ijeoma Umebinyuo


The girl in the red lipstick.


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